Dear Dawn,
And this is how it ends.
I stand in the prom, alone. I had asked you, but never had an answer. So I stand here, in a corner, dressed in something that feels too big for me. It feels like we’ve grown up too quickly and I don’t want that to be.
When we were kids, we were happy, without a bother.
And then, we grew up and our smiles became forced.
Everything that we were, was not true; our real self still hides somewhere in the blue.
We were hurt and broken and felt unloved;
When all the while we were just blind. We never looked around us – at the anchors that were trying to pull us back to the shore. We never looked back at the people who could have helped us. Matter of fact, we never opened up.
When we felt hope was scarce and footprints were missing on the sand, it was when that miniscule remainder of hope was carrying us through every difficult day.
Each day is filled with surprises. Some days will sweep us off our feet while some will crash us down, ten feet under. And even if we continue wearing a harness for the rest of our lives, we will fall. Hard.
No amount of planning can fully prepare us for what is about to arrive.
But that is just life. It is uncertain. It us a mystery. Yet, it is magical.
If we are hurt, we will heal. If we fall, we can still stand up. If we find ourselves lost, there will be light.
I leave the hall and go there, where you had asked me to.
I kneel next to you and kiss you, hard. I feel your hands coming around me and pulling me into a hug. For moments, I sit there on the cold gravel, breathing against you. The wind blows to some silent crescendo, obliterating into the maddening oblivion of the night.
When I finally stand up, I realize the uneven plaster of the tombstone has traces itself across my face. My eyes glimmer with tears and I fight them back.
Below your name, in beautiful calligraphy, is carved, “Loved by all”. How I wish I could tell you how many people cried that day. Each of us is going to miss you in some way.
It is late, but I do realize now, that perhaps every person in the world is looking for a chance and a dawn –
Something to rescue;
Someone to rescue them.
Chance.